ask Knox: champagne moves
Lovin’ it, broheim. All that fancy writing about lurv makes me feel all warm inside, in a sweet way that I haven’t felt in oh so long. But can we take a quick break from all the highfalutin’ jibbajabba (which I’m totally digging, don’t you ever stop, Daddy Knox) for some real talk? To wit: what’s your go-to sexual move? The Yoni Pony? The French Press? And no pussyfooting around it – in the words of Redman, let’s get dirty. Giddyup.
Well, I tend not to get into the nitty gritty too often here for a reason. I have no issue embarrassing myself but I try not to turn off my readers. But for your edification…well, suffice it to say I’ve tried all kinds of things with all kinds of people. The trick isn’t to have some kind of “move” because I’ve found through years of experience that no two women are alike in the sack; they’re like fingerprints.
In contrast, 99 out of 100 men are essentially the same, from what I’ve heard. This means that you need to adapt and improvise as you go along. Be sensitive without being a wuss. Listen intently—not just with your ears. And keep an open mind. If she wants to try some spooky weird shit like rolling in cough syrup and making whoopee on an ant hill, give it some serious consideration. Weigh the pros and cons. And realize that you’re going to get there no matter what; so, getting her there, is really the point.
Ultimately, don’t think in terms of “moves.” Instead, have actions and reactions to fit the person, place and time. That being said, it’s hard to go wrong with Champagne and making out just for making out’s sake. Just make sure you’re a good kisser. I realize this probably isn’t something one can learn, but be aware that if you’re not a good kisser, she won’t be interested in everything else you’re not good at. Giddyup.
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