ask Knox: stripper dating

27May09

mailboxMy boyfriend recently broke up with me and it’s all my fault. Basically, our relationship was marked by jealousy on my side, because he’s a male stripper and I was always freaked out by the fact that ladies and dudes ogled over him every night. Now we’re over and I’m destroyed emotionally. I want to tell my boyfriend I’d do anything to get back together. I just feel like we’re meant to be together, but he won’t he even pick up the phone to hear me out. What do you think I should do?


Jealousy is a foul perfume, my dear, and unfortunately it’s not something you can just get rid of.  Like a virus, it lives inside you and reappears when you are at your weakest.  Sometimes, the best you can do is just try to mask its symptoms by keeping your damn mouth shut when you know in your heart of hearts that he is not the problem so much as your insecurities.

Anyway, I’ve dated one or two strippers in my time, and though I imagine it’s slightly different when the gender is switched up, I think I got the idea.  The best way to deal with the jealousy, in this situation, is to never visit them at work and to respect their job as being their job that pays their bills and is in fact separate from your relationship.  Perhaps this is deluding yourself, I don’t know for certain.  But if you’re the jealous type, you have to dabble in self delusion just to get what I call “the stupid thoughts” out of your head. Whatever the case, dating a stripper has been known to lead to punching a few holes in the wall.

So, I guess I haven’t even answered your question.  What should you do?  What can you do – he won’t even answer your phone calls.  He’s sick of your shit.  Best to wait until he cools down, then make an elaborate, thoughtful gesture to assure him you’ll be good from now on.  But you and I both know that you won’t be.



One Response to “ask Knox: stripper dating”

  1. 1 tawny /retired stripper

    Dear if i can offer advice
    unless you have been in a strippers shoes you cant understand their minds or
    why they do what they do .
    i was a stripper for many years , and in that time , it was part of my identity
    a way i could become a new person , you know the name the clothes
    the mystery . Strippers love to have “control ‘ of not just the stage but the
    customers , so if your not used to this i will behard for you. You see.
    Strippers have a ego problem , and unless you stroke that ego you will not get anywhere with them . If you do decide to get back with your guy
    tryo to put yourself in his shoes LOL and go with him once in awhile to the clubs

    alot of woman get jellous over really nothing , and most of the time
    the stripper is not a call girl on a pole , they have kids and families
    and problems just like yourself , they are making a living
    and they do it cause they love to dance , they love their bodies
    and love the $$$$$$ bling

    i hope you will come to know them as real people
    and that you have no reason to be jellous of them
    maybe this way it will help you understand your man more ;)

    good luck
    Tawny


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